I was looking for a woman who will always have order in the house, but escaped in a week28 октября, 2021
In childhood, we rarely, when there was a full order of the house. Indeed, parents, three children and a dog got along in a small Khrushchev. Any cleaning went on not in a few hours. I remember that sometimes it was awkward, when friends came. Especially those whose dwellings were a sample of purity and order.
I liked that small apartments are kept in perfect condition. But he himself could not even keep his little smoking. Probably the effect of broken windows was triggered, but rather it was simply lazy to break.
When I studied at the Suvorov school, I was my soul army order. Bedside tables, neat tablets. You just could not get used to the sock.
Later I bought an apartment and lived one for some time. That was the kingdom of minimalism. No junk, just all the most necessary. And then women appeared with their junk and annoying factors became a million times more. And I understood — not mine.
Despite all my right guidelines, my life has more reminiscent of chaos. And I had suffered all the time that I could not meet my criteria.
In those days, I operated on black and white categories. The order is okay, the mess. And it should have concerned everything.
I noticed that many women look like with a needle, there are always cleanliness and order in the workplaces, but at home and in the car just dirt and mess. Somehow met one, she brought me to the house. It is not a spin on clothes, all well-groomed, but in the car — a banana smeared on the seat, a bunch of crumpled boxes from McDake, checks on the floor and bottles from the lemonade. Surely you met the like.
When I realized that my perfectionism seriously complicates my life, because I can’t be perfect, and the world does not match my criteria around, began to study this question.
It turned out that people who have an ideal order are less healthy everywhere from a psychological point of view. Any dusting can cause neurosis. And they constantly remove, wash, wipe. And I myself am even worse, as this irritation was experiencing, but I could not constantly dispense myself.
I remembered those guys from childhood, whom ideal mothers, were perfectly dressed, supplied perfect instructions and perfectly controlled.
And once I got such a woman. Then I realized that it was better to live in Bardaka. Women and so brain will be made, but these full Atas. Everything is not true. Life on string. I went to the toilet, and there are already running with a brush and a tool. Permanent control in everything. In two days I learned all women in my work and those who represent a danger to her.
He lasted long. On my order to me?
Since then, my ideals have changed somewhat. Healthy people have little soaring in life and act from how it is considered correct, and not movable their neurosis or a sense of guilt.
Ideally find such an option so that the views coincide, and order, but without fanaticism. Again ideally))))
Clear every other day and do not soar that somewhere dusting. All the same, this type of personality is determined by genetics or upbringing and then it is very difficult to change itself. You have to adapt. And wisdom probably lies in the fact that the world is really not black and white. And our ideas about the ideal only ours.
But he did not learn to take a mess, he raises irritation. But there is from this and a small bonus. When I feel irritated or anxiety for some other occasion, twenty minutes of cleaning lead me into a state of peace of mind. More efficiently meditation, training and other technicians.
And the main skill is not the ability to restore order, but in the ability to negotiate and build. My wife, he is fortunately developed much better than me!